A day in my life? Which one? They’re all different, though they are also all uniformly insane.
Take today, arguably the quietest day I’ve had in…well, forever. Yet even amidst this calm, countless strangers have already told me that by having bought High Desert Books in Applewood, Arizona—a bookstore in a town I never saw before yesterday—I’m living their dream life.
Why? Because they regard being a bookseller as that great? Anyway, I’m not a bookseller. Not yet anyway. Yesterday, I was just a traveling rube with too much cash; now, I’m slapping paint on a tired old book space. I’m not even sure I’m slapping it that well.
Two days ago, I went through a more representative sample of my life. I lost my job in a popular Los Angeles eatery because my boss embezzled it into oblivion. With no work to wile away my working hours, I went home to the Santa Monica abode I shared with my fiancé, Noah, only to find the louse cavorting with a coworker. The capper on that dazzling day? Noah informed me that he had illegally stripped the equity from our house, which the bank was ready to repo.
See? That’s me—always living the dream.
Oh, it wasn’t all bad. I also came across a satchel my ex owns filled with loads of cash—moolah, I presumed he’d amassed by stealing my equity in the house. Needless to say, I grabbed that sucker on my way out the door.
Before I go any further, I should introduce myself. I’m Plum Tardy. No jokes, please, about my goofy name, unless you think we’re both in third grade. If you’re older than that, and I sure am, you need to up your game.
Anyway, now I’m living a country song. You know, what do you do when you lose your job, your man, and your life? If you’re me, you find a new life. I came upon a charming small town, which prior to yesterday was just a name on a map, and thanks to that bag o’ bucks, I bought a business I know nothing about.
If it seems as if I did all this without much of a plan, that’s simply how I roll. While other people are marching straight ahead in life, steadfastly moving towards their goals, I’m always off somewhere playing hopscotch. A jump here, another there, forward, back, with no pattern that ever made any sense to anyone. Including me.
I sometimes think that everyone else must have received a rulebook at birth, complete with guidelines for every eventuality, which guaranteed a successful life. I know that, not only hadn’t I gotten one, I’m so out-of-synch with everyone else, I can’t even imagine how it might read. I’d bet anything that Noah’s naked coworker had it committed to memory.
But, hey, on the big scores front, I discovered that my old high school crush, Brian Coburn, lives in my new town. Let me tell you, the former hottie of Venice High has grown up mighty good. This new life I set up in a flash promises to be interesting. Until, you know, Brian discovers what a hopscotch-playing goof I am. Everyone always does.
The days ahead are sure to be just as offbeat as those that have come before. I figure Noah will show up looking for the satchel filled with money that I took. And I’ll have to deal with his having stolen my equity first. Not to mention learning how to be a bookseller. I also harbor a secret scheme to take on a big box store that wants to bury the small-town character here. With a little luck and some out-of-synch maneuvering, maybe I won’t find myself behind bars in hopscotch hell. But who can say? Not me, that’s for sure.
Giveaway: Leave a comment below for your chance to win one (1) print copy of Hopscotch Life, limited to U.S. residents. Giveaway ends April 22, 2020. Good luck everyone!
Hopscotch Life is a general fiction novel, released March 17, 2020.
Poor Plum Tardy. Between being saddled with a goofy name, to the way she misquotes adages, to her quirky style of dress, Plum always feel out of sync with other people. But even if others do seem to move in lockstep to successes Plum can’t even imagine, while she erratically leaps through life as if it were some giant hopscotch court, that doesn’t explain the startling way her life unravels.
Plum catches her fiancé Noah Rowle in the act with sexy Claire Denton, his partner in a real estate deal designed to allow the soul-sucking Budget-Mart chain to gobble up blocks of land across the country. Thinking her life couldn’t get any worse, she also learns he’s cheated her financially. Desperate to flee, Plum stumbles onto a bag of cash. Assuming that to be the booty Noah took from her, she runs off with it, toward a destination that’s just a name on a map. There, Plum finds a quirky town that needs someone like her. In one crazy leap, she not only makes that place her home, she thinks she’s hit on a way to stop to Noah and Claire’s land score.
But while Plum tries to help her new town halt the steamroller of progress, even with her unconventional perspective she could not have predicted the way her past would collide with her present. Will her offbeat approach save her, or land her in behind bars in hopscotch hell?
Purchase Link
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About the author
Kris Neri loves reading and writing about quirky female protagonists. Kris also writes the Tracy Eaton mysteries, which feature the daughter of eccentric Hollywood stars, and the award-winning Samantha Brennan and Annabelle Haggerty magical mysteries, which feature a questionable psychic who teams up with a modern goddess/FBI agent. Kris makes her home in Silver City, New Mexico, with her husband and two pushy terriers.
All comments are welcomed.
Love the name, plum hilarious, and I wish her luck with the louse and Brian. She’s living the dream–surrounded by books!
Thanks, Nancy! Despite Plum’s comfort in the bookstore (which reflected mine from when I was a bookseller), her life will have a few unexpected bumps and surprising turns. As befits a hopscotch life.
New-to-me author…
Thank you for the giveaway…
Hopscotch Life sounds like my kind of story Would love to win a copy
Sounds like a fun adventure.
I liked the excerpt. It sounds like a really interesting book. Thank you for sharing.
Thanks, Diana. I think it is a pretty fun book.
Poor Prudy catching her fiancé in such a compromising situation. I would really like to read this.
It honestly hurt my own heart to write a scene that hurt Plum so much. But I know that, despite her hopscotch path, there will be better days ahead for Plum. Thanks, Jeanne.
Hopscotch Life sounds like the new normal for 2020! Bring it on now. (I’d be
delighted to win a copy.)
What a good observation, Karlene!
I find Plum’s “Hopscotch” approach to be humorous and fascinating. I look forward to her story! Thanks for a chance to win a copy!
Thanks, Barbara. Plum does keep most people guessing!
Yes please Dru, This sounds like a real fun read. Please toss my name into the Magic Contest Hat.
Great to “see” you here, Nora-Adrienne! I think it is a pretty fun read.
Sounds like the kind of read I need right now! Would love to be in the running for a copy.
Thanks, Lynn. You’re in the mix.
This is a new author to me and this sounds like a really fun book. Thanks so much for the chance!
Thanks, Autumn. I think it is quite fun — it was fun tow write. BTW, it’s free to Kindle Unlimited readers.
Sounds like a fun read. Adding this book to my TBR list.
Thanks, Roseann. It is a fun read — it was fun to write. Thanks for your interest. BTW, it’s free through Kindle Unlimited.
I like the title and the book sounds interesting
Thanks, Sandy. As soon as I did some character work on Plum, I knew what the title had to be.
Oh my. This sounds like the perfect set up for a bunch of funny adventures. Can’t wait!
Lots of funny adventures! Thanks, Pat.
Sounds like a fun read. I will look up the other books she has written.
Thanks, Debbie!
I love the name Plum Tardy–any book with a heroine named that has to be good.
After thinking for weeks about her name, Plum just walked onto the page with her own name.
Sounds like a lot of fun!
Great fun! Thanks, Alicia.
Plum sounds pretty cool. Would love to read her story.
This is a new author for me! thanks for offering this!
Thanks, Linda.
Sounds like a fun one, count me in!
Thanks, Teresa.
Plum certainly has a lot going on.
Well, it is a hopscotch life.
New author to me. Sounds like a great book.
Thanks, Dianne.
**** WINNER ****
Hopscotch Life is Susan F
Congratulations!