Occupation: Butler to Princess Penelope
Highgrove House
November 4, 1983

Today’s events have once again proven that my job description was a false advertisement. When I signed on as butler at Highgrove, I was told Prince Edmund and Princess Penelope would spend weekdays at Kensington Palace, and I would therefore function as a weekday caretaker and weekend butler. The couple would utilize the property as a retreat similar to the Queen at Windsor.

The Prince, however, visits so frequently that he may as well live here full-time. Upon receiving a call that he is “five minutes away,” either in a car or a helicopter, I am required to drop everything and race upstairs to the attic, where I climb out the window and scramble across the roof to raise his Standard. The visits of the Princess, while much less frequent, are inevitably accompanied by gale-force rows and stony silences, requiring the skills of a seasoned diplomat.

I felt distinctly queasy this evening when I saw Princess Penelope’s silver BMW slide to a halt on the gravel outside the kitchen window. Prince Edmund was throwing a birthday soiree for his close friend, Felix Hill, brother of Eleanor Osbourne-Webb—and the Princess was absent from the guest list.

Princess Penelope typically enters Highgrove through the kitchen because she likes to check in with us about all that has transpired since her last visit.

“Welcome, Your Highness,” I said with a bow.

She flashed a dazzling smile before disappearing into the house proper to find her husband and join the festivities, which had only just begun to get underway.

“Take this drinks tray,” I told Lionel our footman, handing him a silver platter. “And be prepared to report back.”

I dislike trafficking in overheard conversations, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned in my ten years of service to the Crown, it is that gossip is essential to doing the job properly.

Lionel returned shortly with a shaken expression, and the following report:

Seeing the Princess, apparently, the Prince had bee-lined toward her and asked, “What are you doing here?”

“You didn’t tell me you were hosting a party tonight,” said the Princess.

The Prince then claimed to have assumed she would not be interested in joining them for Felix’s birthday party, as she finds his friends so stuffy and dull. The Princess pointed out that Felix’s birthday was two weeks ago, and the Prince replied that this was the only weekend that worked for everyone’s schedules.

“Except for Matthew Osbourne-Webb, apparently,” said the Princess. “He didn’t make the guest list either.”

Apparently, the Princess then approached Eleanor Osbourne-Webb, more or less cornering her. “I know what’s going on, Eleanor.”

“What on Earth are you talking about?” asked Mrs. Osbourne-Webb.

“Eleanor, I am not a fool,” said the Princess, loud enough for others to hear. “Stay away from my husband.”

The Royal Game
Genre: Traditional Mystery
Release: January 2024
Format: Print, Digital, Audio
Purchase Link

American pop singer Jennie Jensen is ready to marry the love of her life, England’s Prince Hugh, but someone is determined to keep her from becoming a princess—any way they can. To give her fairy tale a happy ending, she’ll have to play the royal game.

Jennie Jensen is touring Europe, already living her dream, when Prince Hugh of Wales—the future King of England—appears at a gig and requests his favorite song. He’s already smitten and soon, so is she. After a secretive, whirlwind romance, Hugh proposes, and when Jennie accepts, her world changes overnight. She’s still learning to navigate the minefield of constant scrutiny, barbed social interactions, and royal protocol (there are rules about pantyhose), as she learns that not everyone in England is excited about the prospect of an American princess.

When Jennie receives a threatening note, she can’t help but see the parallels between herself and another young woman who struggled to adjust to royal life: Hugh’s mother, Princess Penelope, who was killed in a mysterious plane crash. And as the threats to Jennie grow more serious, she digs into Penelope’s past, discovering a woman who also suspected someone in the palace was out to get her. Was Penelope murdered? And is Jennie next? With the eyes of a nation on her as the royal wedding approaches, she’s in a race against time to save her marriage … and her own life.

Both a charming love story and a thrilling mystery, The Royal Game reveals one woman’s determination to find happily ever after—on her own terms.

About the author
Linda Keir is the pen name of Linda Joffe Hull and Keir Graff. Collaborators for nearly a decade, they are the authors of the acclaimed novels The Three Mrs. Wrights, Drowning with Others, and The Swing of Things. Under their own names, other pseudonyms, and as ghostwriters, they have written nearly two dozen other novels and works of nonfiction. Linda lives in Denver, Colorado, and Keir lives in Chicago, Illinois. Find out more at lindajoffehull.com and keirgraff.com.